Cornwall, Prince Edward Island - Terry and Linda Haddad say their annual New Year’s tradition of booking a sale on an all inclusive resort was hampered this year when they woke up to news that the United States had invaded Venezuela and abducted their president.

Hell, they can’t even go to the USA without finding it invaded by the USA!

:::spoiler In case this isn’t obvious upon reading the article, The Beaverton is satire. Kind of like The Onion before it got enshittified by investment capital. :::