Matt said: “It was a very embarrassing accident. One of the issues with being so large, especially in hot water showers, is that it’s not exactly easy to see my feet.
“Especially when I move too fast, it can definitely mess with my balance, too. As I was rushing to get ready for work, I didn’t see the excess shower gel in the tub because my penis was the only thing in my eye line.
Right, because a fifteen-inch penis is totally going to obstruct your view of both feet and everything else below your waistline, and your dick is totally the reason you clumsily slipped. And you totally aren’t looking for every possible excuse to turn any event of your life into another opportunity to brag about your massive, record-breaking schlong.
🙄
If mine was that big, I’d probably just stare it, too.
Also Tom Segura has a bit about seeing a guy with a large penis
While I appreciate the link, I am absolutely not having that in my watch history. I really don’t want recommendations based on…whatever that is
Oh, c’mon! Where’s your sense of adventure?
It died when my bones started to creak
Mr. Glass?
Feels like it sometimes, ngl
Old age is probably worse, but middle age sucks
Not a very obfuscating username, Mr. Jackson. 🙇🏼♂️
Yeah Tom Segura, yuck
He just described the bulge he sees and then tries to play it off like he wasn’t staring at it. He says dick a bunch, and I think 1 fuck
He just likes to brag & isn’t evolved enough to have a detachable penis.
What a blast from the past!
I don’t even have to clock the link, and King Missile is now playing the hits in my head. 🤘🏼
edit: leaving it, as-is
He does, however, have an enormous penis
Anyone can always acquire an enormous penis & just have it on display somewhere to soothe your day.
It takes one to know one, and buddy…you’re not that guy
Thankfully, neither am I. 😅😶
That sounds suspiciously jealous 😏
“Especially when I move too fast, it can definitely mess with my balance, too.As I was rushing to get ready for work, I didn’t see the excess shower gel in the tub because my penis was the only thing in my eye line.
“I slipped on it, causing me to fall out of the tub completely head first and crack my shoulder on the hard floor.I got two fractures as a result.”
Sounds like he slipped on his penis
this guy gets a burn cooking and he’s like “must’ve been because of my enormous penis” trips on the stairs “dick got caught in the spindles it’s so big” gets sleep apnea “my giant schlong wraps itself around my throat when I’m sleeping”
I mean, to be fair… it must be pretty annoying. Chances are he’s not compatible size wise with 99.99% of women. Probably even jerking off is a massive workout. Probably gets lightheaded each time it fills with blood. Seriously… when you’re this far out of the normal range I recon attention is the main positive thing that comes out of the situation (at least for people who like attention). Everything else just seems needlessly difficult.
Probably gets lightheaded each time it fills with blood.
There was an interview with someone who has a record sized penis, and one of the funniest yet saddest moments was him and his wife talking about how she has to be careful and ‘manage’ his erection during sexual activities so he wouldn’t pass out.
I think I would go get a medical license of some kind and solicit blood donations from friends just so I could pump my blood pressure up to avoid that.
Yeah, I might have seen the same interview. I just didn’t want to put the relevant words into a search engine to figure out specifically what I was vaguely remembering.
No one heard about outercourse. There’s plenty of women that would just…why am I explaining this.
I mean, yes there are other ways to be intimate with each other than penetration. However as far as I can tell a lot of men are very attached to the idea of penetration when it comes to sex. I would assume it would feel quite debilitating not to have the option when you really want to have the option. Then again what do I know. I am missing the necessary parts to know what any of that feels like from the male side.
Yeah sure. Just find an open-minded man, and give him a prostate massage. And before you know it, he will be whimpering like a bitch. So so many ways. It’s a culture issue.
can confirm it’d be low-key existentially horrifying to not be able to plug it in, it’s not just that it feels good but it’s the… symbolic? aspect of it, for me. Like a hug but you can do it while also embracing each other, hell yeah.
It’s just curious.
Summary of the article. " By the way I have a massive cock, it is just huge, biggest in the world. Did I say about my massive unit? It is really big…oh I slipped in the shower and broke my arm,…but let’s get back to the massive third leg I have going on. ,"
“Oops, I dropped my magnum condom for my magnum dong”
FWIW, that brand was specifically designed and marketed for average dicks to feel bigger. It’s their whole thing.
It’s a product within a brand, but it actually is larger. You can look up the dimensions if you want.
Not the “ummakshually” you thought it’d be.
This dude has been in the news before, and again for some non-story, but thinly veiled trying to spread as much as possible exactly how long and thick his dong was. I mean good for him (or bad, many women’s vaginas won’t accommodate that), but he comes off as attention-seeker of the lowest order.
Funny story, but the size of my penis is why my balls always get wet when I pee.
Me too!
Unrelated but this newspaper says:
Join our WhatsApp! Our community members are treated to special offers, promotions and adverts from us and our partners
There’s people that are actually saying “hell yes! Send me ads on WhatsApp, here’s my phone number!” ???
The world’s full of 'em, and many others, yep.
Ever since I’ve personally heard “I like some of these ads”, I’ve lost faith in the masses
there’s people falling in love with chatgpt, or taking medical advice or therapy from it. I’d take someone who gives away their number to receive ads kind of idiot every day of the week over that kind.
I was careless, didn’t look where I stepped, it was totally because of my dick. Let me tell you more about it…
Seriously. Dude is acting like he can’t see the floor because his dick is in the way. Be one thing if he had syncope due to blood flow. Just didn’t look.
…independently measured at [37cm], and a cast of it has been included in a museum in Iceland.
I have questions for Iceland; mostly about how to pronounce ð but we’ll get to that later
uh, a 14er. Climbers everywhere, rejoice.
Is that flacid or erect length?
Edit: its erect length. When flacid, it was 25cm long
The fucked up pronunciation in Icelandic comes from when you put to Ls together, e.g. Eyjafjallajökull. It makes an almost click sound.
More or less like the english th. Thorn (letter)
Sort of. ð is the Icelandic rendering for both edh and thorn, depending on context. Edh is voiced, thorn isn’t.
It’s the “unvoiced” part that confuses me
voiced th is like this, that, mother
unvoiced th like thick, thimble, thirty
notice how the voiced th has a buzzing vocalization during the th sound, you can feel your teeth buzzing as you say the th in this
but when you pronounce thirty that buzzing is absent and the first buzzing starts with the i (the vowel is the first voiced part).
similar to th as in the English word thick, or a (usually apical) voiced alveolar non-sibilant fricative [ð̠],[2][3] similar to th as in the English word the
Should do the trick, no?
That’s what she said?
Sadly not.
Truth.
V and F are basically the same sound, except V is voiced. Alternate between them like VVVVVVVVVVVVVFFFFFFFFFVVVVVVVVVFFFFFF while touching your throat, you’ll feel the throat vibrate while saying V but not for F
eth, not thorn
Th
It’s pronounced like the “th” in “weather.”
Like a T, but slide your tongue forward a little so it’s against your teeth
do you not have your tongue against the teeth when saying T?
Not usually. “Not” has my tongue against the top of my mouth, just back from the base of the teeth. But if we’re talking about Lindt chocolate, that has your tongue against your teeth and you pull it back, making that sharp release of air. That’s the thorn sound.
Envious men please remember vaginas do have an ending. Don’t trust hentai, your penis will NOT come out of our mouths
Next you’re going to tell me that piss doesn’t come from the balls? Please.
The cervix is just a door if you knock hard enough.
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We know about the 666 man. Six figures salary. Six inches. Six feet tall.
Nothing about the 5’10 8” $95k guys anywhere
Ok that is the most ridiculous explanation I have ever heard. Do you have to see your feet to know where they are? And how do large busted or pregnant women manage then?
Oof it must suck to be hung that big though. No balls deep in anyone, ever, and careful sex only.
Do people even focus on their body parts that much on the day-to-day? It seems like something that you wouldn’t think about usually.
When you have a 37cm pénis that’s probably all you can think about.
At that size, it better be paying the bills.
I promise it’s a real issue for women.
I have been pregnant but don’t remember falling down because I couldn’t see my feet! I do remember my belly knocking into doorways when I miscalculated though, since it keeps growing.
Oh don’t get me wrong. His excuse is absurd! Because you can move your feet in the shower if something is obstructing your view. My point was that yes having a body part that prevents you from seeing immediately below it can be a nuisance.
Keeps?! How? They didn’t cover that in Sex Ed. 😶
Well until the baby comes out, lol. The things I remember trying that were much harder with the constantly shifting weight distribution were roller skating and cartwheels. Bigger and bigger till the baby punches its way out of your abdomen (since in sex ed they probably didn’t cover that part either).
But seriously, if women can handle that constant change in weight distribution, I am sure a guy with a massive schlong can handle having it without falling over. Unless it has a mind of its own and gets tangled around his legs or something.
Wait, you have busted and/or pregnant women watching your feet?
are all the impressed comments in here from men lol
14.5 inches, what an absolute unit
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In the Godfather novel, Sonny Corleone couldn’t have a decent sex life because of his gargantuan penis until he landed a woman with a deep vagina. I am not making this up.
Dong Corleone
OMG it’s real
is there a way to block all posts with links to a specific site?
UBlock origin will let you do this. Come back to this comment in a couple minutes…
Edit: Add something like this to your uBlock Origin custom filters. (The sites I included are all paywalls, but you can substitute your own)
feddit.org.##.title:has-text(/theintercept.com|economist.com|military.com|wired.com|theverge.com|theglobeandmail.com|404media.co|nytimes.com|vox.com|washingtonpost.com|theatlantic.com/)This will turn something like this:
into something like this:
(The “Anker’s Sound” post has had its link and headline hidden)
Reddit Enhancement Suite had FilteReddit, which had more fine grained controls to block posts linking to specific sites. I’ve been looking for a Lemmy equivalent, but UO is the best I’ve found so far.
Wow poor guy is probably going to get a lot of sympathy cards. Must be awful.
I can all but guarantee most women run away at the sight of it.
And the ones that don’t, he’s running from.
i mean you don’t have to put it in, i’m sure plenty of women would still have lots of fun in other ways.
That’s on them.
Jesus. They don’t make pants big enough for this guy.
Maybe JNCO
Deep cuts. 🤌🏻
